Pkv Cruising for a Bruceing

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Sometimes, it’s not easy being a football fan. A friend of mine was recently asked which team he supported, “I’ve never been to a football match.” he replied, “I rarely leave my house for longer than 20 minutes, as I can’t use public toilets due to my Pkv minuscule equipment. I can’t watch football at home either, because excessive solo lovemaking has led to serious vision problems. As a result, I have no affiliation with football, or any particular team.”

 

He just couldn’t admit to being a Birmingham City fan, it would have been too embarrassing.

 

After a seven goal thumping on their own patch, the Blues must be dreading a trip to Old Trafford. United are the good things of the weekend at 2/9, and the 6/1 on offer for United finding the net six times or more is worth a 2nd look.

 

There must be something in the water in Birmingham, Aston Villa are also going through a poor spell. Like their neighbours, Villa have been unlucky with injuries. Berger has rarely played, Mellberg has been in and out of the first 11 and perhaps most cruelly of all, Ridgewell has been continuously available for selection. No wonder O’Leary’s always moaning.

 

It’s a good job the Villa have a few points in the bag from earlier in the season, as you can’t foresee a Villa win under any circumstances. Fulham have steadfastly refused to win away from home, at Villa Park, they have no choice. Fulham are a great bet at 2/1.

 

In a week where Robbie Savage received a 2nd yellow card and Liverpool strikers were scoring for fun, it was refreshing to see Chelsea players surround the ref in an aggressive fashion and a John Terry challenge in the penalty area go unpunished, ensuring a swift return to normality.

 

Man City are the next visitors to the Bridge; a bad week for Stuart Pearce is about to take a turn for the worse. The Psycho must regret resting his star players and Darius Vassell in a defeat to Wigan last week, as the Hammers knocked them out of the Cup two days later. City have two chances at Stamford Bridge, slim and none; and slim has just gone on the Atkins. Chelsea are available at 2/7, it’s your duty to be on.

 

Blackburn are a great looking bet at 8/13 to leave the Stadium of Light with three points. Craig Bellamy has scored in his last three matches and netted twice against the Mackems in the reverse fixture earlier in the season. It’s 9/2 that the Welshman bags another pair, help yourself to a double Bells.

 

Everton haven’t enjoyed their trips across the park in recent years, they haven’t won at Anfield since 1999; pop midget ‘Prince’ was so impressed he wrote a song about it. The Reds currently look unplayable; the 8/13 on the table is more than fair.

 

Liverpool scoring 15 goals in 3 games was surprising, but the fact that all four of their much maligned strikers found the net left me genuinely stunned. Move over the Beatles, Liverpool have a new ‘Fab 4’. Cisse is Ringo (mediocre), Morientes is George (superfluous), Crouch is Paul (over-rated), and Fowler is John (shot). A tough but fair comparison. I’m still not convinced by Crouchy, if you’re a believer, he’s an 11/8 shot to find the net in the derby.

 

 

 

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